I am baisically 9 months pregnant with our 2nd child. Which means I have been nesting and dreaming of this baby’s first year of life for a very long time. Dreams that involved where we are NOW. We bought our cute little house in Gilbert 3 years ago, just before finding out we were pregnant with our FIRST child, Gavin. Ever since then I have been nesting in this house - especially this past year! This entire past year during this pregnancy I have been dreaming up, and Eric has been bringing to life, amazing home projects. I’m just about finished with Gavin’s “big boy room” and it’s everything I dreamed of... Dark, Navy Blue walls with a gorgeous dark wood panel accent wall; vintage “camp/outdoor” theme. All new furniture... Just perfect for our little boy! I’m obsessed with it! I am almost finished redesigning the nursery for our second baby boy... New paint, new shiplap accent wall, new wall art, etc.. I had just started redoing Gavin’s bathroom, our master bedroom, our back patio, etc.. Seriously, you name it and I have been dreaming up plans and finally starting to execute them for this house. I LOVE our house! And it feels like everything I accomplished in it this last year is all just a waste now because we will barely get to enjoy it before the move and there is no point in even finishing any of the projects. *sigh* ...It is what it is, I guess.
All of my motherhood memories are in this house. Have I mentioned how sentimental I am? I imagined our children growing up here in our beautiful suburban neighborhood. We live right by the best schools in the state. The City of Gilbert has been listed as one of the safest cities in the entire country! Our Ward (that’s LDS speak for “local church community”) is absolutely fantastic. I have made SO many WONDERFUL mom friends that I really love who have children my son’s age (lots of little boys!). Most of my friends just gave birth to sons in the past year! We have great neighbors all around us. There are parks and playgrounds around every corner and access to a 27 mile green belt walking trail right across the street from our driveway. In a nutshell, I LOVE OUR HOME AND I LOVE GILBERT! We live close to my family, blah blah blah... I have literally been living in mom paradise over here! It’s hard to walk away from that!
Fast forward to a few weeks ago... Eric sees a job opening in Payson. We look at each other and without words are thinking the same thing “Why not? We’ve always talked about how cool it would be to live there! Doesn’t hurt to apply!” We knew it would be a competitive opportunity - and it was - so we were both hopeful but cautiously optimistic about it all. Didn’t want to get our hopes up too high but had to at least throw our name in the hat.
Next thing I know he’s got a phone interview. Then shortly after that he’s invited up to Payson to tour the hospital and interview in person. He takes me and Gavin with him so we can check things out too. Gavin and I wait in the hospital lobby while he tours the OR, etc.. Afterward, the interviewer shows us around one of the nearby neighborhoods and takes us to grab ice cream where we can sit down and he and Eric can talk more. I luckily get to listen to the rest of the interview from here. I worked in executive recruiting for a few years, I knew from what I was hearing that things were going well in this interview. It all felt really exciting. He told us they were hoping to make a decision on a candidate by the end of the week. We thanked him for his time, said our good byes, and started the hour long drive home.
Once in the car I had a very strong feeling Eric was going to be offered the job. Which is a good thing, but it all started to hit me pretty hard what that actually meant. Que the pregnancy hormones! ...I pretty much cried the entire way home. Super hormonal right now! I am also in major nesting mode, and like I said before, I am a very sentimental person. I just needed to mourn and process everything that started running through my mind. Things like: My baby is probably never going to get to sleep in that nursery I just designed for him. Gavin isn’t going to make it into his big boy bed before we relocate out of that room we just designed for him. Our children aren’t going to grow up in our cute house or go to those schools. They aren’t going to grow up alongside all these great neighborhood kids we know. I’m moving an hour away from all my awesome girlfriends. Yeah we can still see each other, but it won’t be as often and it won’t be for quick, impromptu play dates at the park or late night walks on a whim. It will take PLANNING... Ugh! I HATE having to PLAN stuff with friends! I just want to spontaneously go and do stuff.
I started thinking about all kinds of random things that I just needed to cry about so I could get it off my chest and move on. It’s just how I operate. I need to talk through things with someone and cry, and then I’ll be ok. I have been through some pretty tough, life-altering things before... A really good new job opportunity for my husband that will require us to move to a beautiful small mountain town is hardly a problem to be upset over! My mom even said “there are worse problems to have!” ...And she is so right.
Two days after his interview he got the job offer. I am not at all surprised at this point. I witnessed that interview. I knew it was coming. I had had a few days to process it all at this point and was feeling more at peace about the impending changes. That’s not to say I wasn’t still feeling very emotional about it all - but at least I got those initial sobs and vent sessions out of the way. Eric told them he wanted to discuss it further with me and pray about it, etc. so we took the weekend to mull it over. We spent time with my mom and dad talking about it. We went to the temple and prayed. We felt peace and both walked away with the same feeling - that Payson is where we need to go. Eric knew this all along. I think the whole “take a few days” was more for my benefit than for him. Either way, I appreciate him allowing me to take the time I needed to come to the same realization. He’s a great husband.
So here we are now! About to have a baby in 1-2 weeks and then a month later Eric starts his new job up in Payson. It is going to be pretty crazy figuring out a place to live up there, boxing up our stuff, and moving up north with a newborn and a 2 year old in tow, but we can do it. I told Eric when he first applied to the job before he even got an interview “If it works out and we have to move after just having a baby, that’s ok. We are a strong team and we can do hard things.” And I really do believe that. Honestly the part that is stressing me out the most is figuring out where we are going to live and what to do with our house here in Gilbert. We will need to rent for the first year up there but apparently rentals are really hard to come by in Payson, so there really aren’t many options for us to choose from... Like there might be ONE house available to rent that suits our needs that we can afford, and that’s it. We’ll probably have to just take whatever we can get and endure for the first year.
It’s going to be a sacrifice but that’s ok. My dad has recently said “Through the sacrifice comes the blessings. Through sacrifice comes the refining. Exalted come through sacrifice and enduring well.” And, like always, he is right and always says exactly what I need to hear. We will figure everything out and Heavenly Father will guide us and put us where we are supposed to be. We may not understand or be able to see the big picture in the beginning, but we trust in Him and the path He has for us. It all comes together in the end. And another great point my dad made regarding the move, “...little boys don’t care about things like the kitchen and the bedrooms, they just want to get outside and play. And Payson will have everything a little boy loves to get out and get dirty in.” And again, he’s right and my perspective is realigned and brought back to what is most important, and that’s the happiness and quality of life for my family. Not material THINGS that hold no real value. I really am excited for what this will all mean for our family. I just had to work through the sentimental emotions I was feeling about our current home situation.
Change can be hard at first but in the end is usually a very good thing for us. We will make new friends while continuing to love the old. We will make a new home for ourselves in the mountains and enjoy the extra time this new job will allow us to have together as a family. We won’t be THAT far away from our friends and family in the valley so we plan of course to stay in touch and still get together with everyone as often as we can. Eric will have more than double the vacation time and half the daily workload he has now which will allow us to travel and make plans more easily than we have been able to for the past 4 years. I am so looking forward to having him home more and being able to have more quality family time together. All good stuff ahead!
Wish us luck! I will keep you posted on how things unfold. For now though, first things first - we are having another baby and I can’t wait to meet him!!